The U.S. military academy some years ago did a psychological study on the characteristics of successful military commanders in time of war. They found that the largest single ingredient of success was not the excellence of the plan, but, regardless of which plan was chosen, the tenacity with which that plan was carried out.

Tenacity is the ability to break down large goals into smaller ones and systematically pursue them one at a time until their final completion. The managers of world champion boxers, as an example, are very talented men who know the length of time it takes to get from raw materials to finished product. They very carefully choose their fighter's opponents so that each opponent will tax their fighter's strength without exhausting him. The choice is always an attempt to get an opponent who will stretch a fighter's talents just beyond his present ability.

They don't want a patsy and they know the results of putting their man up against a good fighter too soon. They are not so interested during the early development of his ring talents in whether or not he wins as they are in his acquisition of confidence. Initially winning is nothing so that eventually it can be everything.

Now, the first rule for the moral man, since he is moral, is that he never takes anything from a relationship with a woman without giving back something of equal value. In the beginning you may use a woman as a means to increasing your social knowledge and ability just as long as you are satisfied that she will also be a happier person with a little deeper insight into life and you in no way imply some continued future relationship that does not exist.

A man has first to keep in mind that a certain maturation process is necessary to the acquisition of any skill. You must transfer your conscious knowledge, in handling a situation, from your mind to your habits. This change takes time. You want to integrate a certain way of handling things so deeply into your personality that you can begin to react automatically.

Social life or "hustling" women is the acquisition of social skills. Social skills are habits and their acquisition requires time.

For instance, in the game of tennis it takes eight to ten years of dedicated work to reach the top. But it takes only four or five years to master the stroke production sufficiently. The remaining years are used to acquire the skill of knowing when to hit which shots where, and to be able to do so under sustained pressure as a habit.

Social life is a similar pursuit. The acquisition of poise essentially means putting oneself into social situations under pressure often enough to acquire poise. In tennis you must be able to produce the shot; in social life, you learn to bluff.

A man then carefully chooses the woman he dates as to their capacity to be just beyond his reach, and he pursues them. During this process of acquiring poise he does everything in his power to help each woman attain whatever capacity for charm that is in her.

As long as a woman is willing to grow, stay with her. You will find, however, that very few people, men or women, are willing to sustain their initial enthusiasm over a long period of time. If she refuses to grow and learn, speak your piece and go your way. It is not your responsibility to save people from themselves. If you can't raise her up, she will eventually drag you down, and vice versa.